Dropping Weight Like A Drug Dealer

*Our scene opens as we see K-Money in an undisclosed gym with Waitin for my downfall by Chamillionaire blaring in the background. K-Money is running on a treadmill at an amazing pace. The camera pans around to get a good shoot of K-Money's face just to let you see how focused he really is. Sweat is pouring off K-Money onto his workout gear and everywhere else for that matter. His white wife beater and gray sweat pants are soaked, probably the only dry thing he has on are some old jordans. K-Money doesn't even worry about stopping to wipe the sweat away, he just pushes on with his workout. You want to question this man's work ethic? You wanna question this man's hunger? You wanna question this man's heart? YOU ASK TO MANY FUCKIN QUESTIONS! K-Money stops the treadmill but still doesn't even acknowledge the camera as he moves on to the heavy bag. He throws a right and a left, ducks right, throws another right and left, then ducks left. K-Money keeps repeating this sequence pummeling the heavy bag with some of the best hands in the wrestling business. K-Money seems to have had his fill of the heavy bag and he now moves on to the speed bag. He may weigh more than he ever has in his career but his hand speed is still BLAZING! K-Money lights up the speed bag with right hand after right hand then swicthes it up and does the same with his left hand. K-Money stops hitting the bag and rushes across the gym where a gym bag sits beside a digital scale. He grabs a bottle of water out of the duffel bag and chugs some out it before throwing the bottle back into the back. K-Money then steps onto the digital scale and looks down in anticipation, the camera zooms in on the scale and it reads 235.*

K-Money:SHIT! I'm killing myself more getting myself back down to weight than I did winning the fuckin title shot to begin with. If the current cruiserweight champion wasn't a complete push over I might be in trouble.

*K-Money grabs the bottle of water from the duffel bag again but this time dumps it over his head. He then grabs a towel from the bag and puts it over his head as he sits on a nearby weight bench and begins to speak*

K-Money:Seriously thug wait let me correct that shit right now, you ain't a mutha fuckin thug so I ain't even gonna call you that. Q.C. if I were facing anybody other than you I'd probably have waited until Lord Of The Ring to cash in my title shot. Since its you though, I figured I might as well just collect my title now and get it out of the way. Q.C. I'll even give you a way out of this match, if you can find one person, JUST ONE! Who truly believes that you have any chance of walking out of our match with your title intact, I won't even show up! So basically Q.C. YOU HAVE NO FUCKIN WAY OUT! You even know your fucked, you might think I forgot but I remember when you came into the XWF and proceeded to jump directly on my dick. When me and T-Money dropped that "Church Of The Almighty Dollar" shit we had all you fake gangsta's going crazy wanting to use it in your promos. This isn't even fair because not only am I fighting a garbage ass wrestler, I'm fighting one of my fans. Thats why I chose you Q.C. even though I just had a title match in PWE a few days ago and even though I'm having to bust my ass to make weight, THE DECK IS STILL STACKED AGAINST YOU! You do not match up well against me and nothing you do is going to change that. You've spent the better part of your XWF career on Impact trying to perfect your in ring ability and even more so, your gimmick. I've never had to spend any time on Impact to perfect anything. My skills inside that wrestling ring are second to none QC and unlike you, this shit isn't a gimmick for me, its real life. No matter how much you work on filling the holes in your story its still going to be a story. Sure those holes that rival size of your mother's vagina aren't helping you but at the end of the day it just doesn't matter. The other main reason that I picked you QC is the simple fact that your making my cruiserweight title look like complete shit. Lets be honest here QC, you shouldn't be competing for anything other than the xtreme and maybe the hart title. Notice I said competing for, you shouldn't be winning any of them. However with this talent depleated XWF roster this is what the fans get, your punk ass holding the cruiserweight title and single handedly killing the divsion. When you really think about it QC I'm doing you a fuckin favor because if it wasn't for me they were going to strip you of the cruiserweight title and get rid of it. Yet again I have to become the savior for the cruiserweight division, I have to be the one to put it on my back and carry it to respectability. QC you had your chance to do that but what did you do? You won the belt and haven't been seen on XWF t.v. since then. Now since you have a match with me your in the match right before the Anarchy main event. This is probably the closet that you've been to sniffing an Anarchy main event in your entire career, YOUR FUCKIN WELCOME!

*K-Money reaches back into his gym bag and pulls out his newly won PWE Vicious title. K-Money drapes the title over his shulder and continues spitting venom like a cobra*

K-Money:Now, I told ya'll that I was going into the PWE Destiny pay per view and coming out as the PWE Vicious champion and that is exactly what I did. Do ya'll get it now? Are you finally starting to understand that I don't get in these promos and say shit for my health? I don't do it because it makes me look good, and I definetely don't do it to make my opponents look like idiots. Ok, I lied about that last one but everything else I said was nothing but the truth. I get in these promos to smash mutha fuckas but at the same time I'm letting everybody know exactly what is going to happen. Not what might happen, not what could happen, WHAT WILL HAPPEN! You can try to dispute that all you want but please, name one thing that I've been wrong about thus far. I said I would smash Diabolique and I knocked her the fuck out. I said I would smash everybody in the battle royal without even knowing who was in it. It ended up having an abysmal turnout but I still I got the job done. Just a few days ago I told Diabolique I was going to leave here without a title and I told Masahura Tanabashi that I would embarrass him all in the same match. My words rang true yet again, at this point I might as well start giving out my phone number on t.v. because I've predicted more shit than that bitch Miss Cleo ever did. Sure its possible for me to be wrong, its even possible for me to lose. Yeah, its also possible for Peter Gilmour to beat James Raven, its possible for Dan Fierce to sleep with a women, and its possible that Elvis could be at a bar playing poker with Tupac as we speak! Yeah there are a lot of possibilities, but that doesn't mean they are really going to happen. I'm 43W/13L/2D counting my PWE record. My last loss came at the end of my last XWF run when T-Money got jumped backstage and I had a nice two on one match. Before that, I truly don't remember when the fuck my last loss was or who it was against, thats how rarely they fuckin happen. I know for damn sure I won't be losing this week either, QC eliminated what little possibility he had of beating me when he announced that this would be his last match in the XWF for the foreseeable future. So basically what we have now is K-Money Vs a guy who has always been mediocre and who now has no reason to put on a good show because he's gone after this match weather he wins or loses. Check the line in Vegas, this has to be some sort of record, the odds on this match have to be damn near a million to 1 and thats being generous. You know, if I wasn't allergic to losing I'd bet everything I had on QC to win then throw the match, then again that would be a heavy price to pay. Sure I'd be rich beyond my wildest dreams which is pretty damn rich because I already count my money by the pound and I ain't talkin euros. Still if I lost to QC I would never be able to show my face in the streets again, and I'm pretty sure that there is a stipulation for QC's matches where losing to him requires the removal of your balls. I would ask Chasm about it but he didn't have any to begin with so he had nothing to lose.

*K-Money leaves the towel and vicious title sitting on the weight bench as he stands up drops to the floor and begins doing some push ups. K-Money continues his promo as he works out*


K-Money:The really funny thing about everything that has happened recently is the fact C.H.A.D. has declared war on myself and the PWE but I'm actually going to make the XWF better. Yeah at the end of the day I'm currently representing PWE and it looks real good for PWE that a PWE wrestler is holding an XWF belt. Still, the XWF is going to be getting something out of this deal too, they are going to get a REAL cruiserweight champion and a REAL cruiserweight division. The fact that QC and Chasm were fighting for my belt is a fuckin disgrace and the fact that QC sat on his ass for weeks after the PPV with ZERO challengers listed for his belt is down right blasphemous. I know damn well that there is SOMEBODY on the current XWF roster besides QC that is under 230 pounds, its just that since Jon Brown left the entire XWF staff just wants to sit on their lazy asses while the XWF crumbles around them. You know what, ya'll keep the crumblin to yourselves because as of this moment I'm declaring myself GM of the Cruiserweight Division! Ya'll wanna be lazy, thats fine because I stay on my mutha fuckin grind. I'll name my challenegers, I'll set up my title matches, hell I'll even draw up the mutha fuckin contracts! The cruiserweight title isn't something that should be looked at like a joke, thats the Xtreme title. The cruiserweight title shouldn't be looked at as a title that any bum off the street can come in and win, thats the Hart Title. The cruiserweight title should be looked at in the same light that it was when I held it, the moment I lost my cruiserweight title I was offered a shot at the Universal title. That is what the title is all about my friends, the cruiserweight title should be a stepping stone. If your a dominant cruiserweight champion fuck all those other bullshit titles, you should jump straight into world and universal title contention. I don't care who disagrees with me and I don't care what anybody else has to say about the matter. At the end of the day, I RUN THE CRUISERWEIGHT DIVISION NOW! If you don't like it, come take my title from me. If your a fat ass, lose some weight, the cruiserweight division will be happy to have you.

*K-Money has had enough of the push ups and stands up glaring into the camera as he speaks*


K-Money:Are you watching this closely QC? Have you taken notes? THIS IS GANGSTA NIGGA! Your the cruiserweight champion while I'm the challenger yet I've just taken control of the entire fuckin division because I said so! Since your already on your way out of the XWF QC, why don't you take this time to actually step foot in the streets. Go ahead niggs, take a walk through the ghetto for the first time in your mutha fuckin life. Just make sure you set 911 to number 1 on your speed dial because real hood niggas can smell a pussy like you coming a mile away. Seriously nigga you shouldn't even be thinkin about dropping a promo and sayin a mutha fuckin word to me because you don't have the right. I'm a mutha fuckin beast in the ring and in the streets, nigga back in march you were having a feud with KIMEE MOOKS! AND YOU GOT YOUR ASS HANDED TO YOU! Not only did you get beat by a garbage ass nigga with a womens name, after he beat you, HE GAVE THE TITLE AWAY! Your ass is so mutha fuckin garbage that another garbage ass wrestler didn't even want you to have the cruiserweight title! QC, at the end of the day I'm one of the greatest pound for pound wrestlers of all time. No matter who you ask K-Money is going to be in their top 5, top 10 if they are haters, if I'm not mentioned at all then they just straight up don't know what the fuck they are talking about. You on the other hand, we could do a poll on who were the top 50 cruiserweight champions in XWF history, AND NOBODY WILL PUT YOU ON THE LIST! At the end of the day QC you do get to be on a list of legendary wrestlers but the only thing that your going to have in common with them is that you lost to me!

*With that our cameras fade to to black*


*******Start Commercial*******

*Our commercial opens as the cameras slowly move down Sesame Street and we hear the voice of the movie preview guy*

MPG:Sesame Street used to be a nice place......until he showed up.



MPG:As ashy as the day is long, with a grill like a fuckin truck, QC Thug turned this quite little community upside down. He taught them how to fight, he taught them how to steal, he taught them how to love.



MPG:You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll want to commit suicide. You'll pretty much think that your watching a QC Thug Promo but you won't be. Coming to a theater near you. QC Thug in his first and only starring role, "I Own Sesame Street".



MPG:QC, if you were still wondering how everybody feels about you, well........



*******End Commercial*******

*Our scene opens as we see K-Money sitting in the recording studio of HTH (Hustle The Hardest) Xm radio. K-Money figured he might as well do radio / webcast interview to boost the ratings a little. Sitting across from him in the studio is DJ Blades. Blades switches the station over to live and here we go*

DJ Blades:Here we are with the boss, the PWE vicious champion, soon to be XWF cruiserweight champion, K-Money!

K-Money:Its nice to stop by my radio station, I actually had time to get in here for once

DJ Blades:I was actually suprised you made it, aren't you supposed to be losing weight for your big mach on thursday?

K-Money:I'm pretty close weight wise so I've started to ease up a bit on now. I've killed myself in the gym for the last few days so a need a little time to relax.

Dj Blades: Relaxation is always a good thing. Now I'm sure I'm not the only one that wants to know, once you win the cruiserweight title, what are your plans after that.

K-Money:I like how you said once I win it and not if I win it, somebody is looking for a pay raise. As far as my plans go, after Anarchy I'll have had four matches and won two titles. I think its safe to chalk this XWF / PWE run up as a success. So I'm going to defend both titles until I finally lose them which could be a while considering the way I've been smashing people lately. Now will I try to go after the Universal title in either fed? Who knows, right now I'ma just take things on a week by week basis cuz when you start making long term plans thats usually when bad shit happens.

Dj Blades: Sounds good to me. Do you have any intentions of a Blood Hound resurrection or maybe getting involved with a new group.

K-Money:Unless T-Money comes back to the XWF full time, there won't be a Blood Hound resurrection. As far as another group goes, I really don't know. I've been involved with the Blood Hounds my entire career and as Blood Hounds we were all equals. At this stage I'm bringing two titles to the table as well as a legendary career, who can be my equal? With that being said, pretty much the only way I'd get involved with another stable is if I called the shots.

Dj Blades:Ok, ok, fair enough. Now I know you said you wanted to keep this interview short so I'm only going to ask you one more question. I've heard you've been in contact with quite a few former roster members about having matches against you, is there any truth to that and can you comment on it?

K-Money:All I'm gonna say about that is that I get phone calls all the time from people talking about doing this or that but half of it never happens. To this day I'm still waiting to get my match with Alex Cutwright so I can put him to shame. There is one person I've seen around here for a while that I've been waiting to get in the ring with and I'm gonna address that on Anarchy, so tune in because I've got a few big announcements

Dj Blades: You heard it here first, K-Money has some new to deliver on Anarchy, make sure you une in, for HTH radio this is Dj Blades and that was my special guest K-Money

*With that the radio / webcast ends and the cameras fade to black*